The 16th Day (The Gas)


In Gaza, you cannot sleep or even think about sleeping. How could you, when you smell blood, in each and every corner?
You hear your heart pumping uncontrollably for the unknown future. Your eyes see nothing but death.
The sounds of the attacks from the artillery and the planes is constantly increasing. The number of martyrs is counted by the hundreds; the wounded by the thousands. Your heart has died and your senses are numbed.
You stay in a house that is not yours. Time passes slowly like a big rock on your chest that does not want to move even with a massive earthquake. 
At any point, anything could happen in your town. Anything became expected. This time the aggression of the occupying forces is reaching every breathing creature on this 350 square kilometer, small land of Gaza. 
On the 16th day of the war, at dawn in particular, the sky became full of smoke that penetrates the nose, affecting the brain function. It carries suffocating and killing smell that shakes everyone up from their sleep.  People immediately run to the windows and the doors to close them, only to come face to face with two dilemmas: The threat of losing their windows from the shootings and suffocation for keeping their windows open.
Whether it is a cloud of poisonous gas, a curtain of smoke, or a blanket of suffocating gas, we are unable define what is in the air at this moment. 
All we know is that the sky is opening its gate, so that many souls could pass through. Eventually the gate might have had accommodated enough number of souls that it will eventually be by our side and save the rest of us who are still alive.
Ironically, you still asked yourself, “Can I even dream? Can I go back to the time when I was a creature that does not think?”.
Due to the aggression and the assault, the main concern of the human being is to look for food only. It’s the time when human beings don’t even think that the air that they breathe contains oxygen, or even what constitutes the water that they drink.
It’s the time when a human being takes anything from the ground. anything that he can find. He only cares about his own survival without harming the others.
Can you go back to the time when everyone in the world is looking for coexistance and integration?
Can you really abandon this big life when the concerns of the individuals is to kill fellow human beings, in order to be close to other types of human beings? 
What if you abandon this peace and go back to the time when you are provided with a shelter to sleep under… 
What if it doesn’t no whether the air is clean or polluted; whether water is scarce; if there is electricity; if other humanitarian supplements are available; or if we have created beasts or monsters to live amongst us…
What if you could go back to the time before this cursed war and before the stones of your house that protects your face are destroyed…
What if you died before these images bombard your head, before you could train your senses to feel death wherever you look…
Your senses are no longer yours nor in your power;  they are controlled by a bigger power that is stronger than this entire life.
It’s the oppression that kills you from the inside… 
It kills every individuals that live under the sky of this city…
Every living part of your body…
You try to tell your nose, “Don’t smell! Don’t smell! Don’t smell!”.
You force your eyes not to see and you choose to resort to your imagination. 
You force yourself to think of one thing and one thing only: “I will stay alive!”. 

About nataallh

"It is an attempt to be me"
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